The idea of writing a blog wasn’t even on my radar screen until last November when I started to use Twitter for professional development. I am fascinated by all of the great thoughts and ideas that people share on Twitter, and by reading the many blogs that are posted daily I’ve been able to deepen my knowledge and understanding of countless topics through the reflections of other educators and learners in my PLN. Over the months since I’ve been on Twitter, I’ve often thought that I should start a blog. Sharing my ideas in 140 characters is great, but I often feel that I want to write more—share my ideas with more depth, more detail.
Despite my best intentions, and the strong encouragement of the bloggers in my PLN, I’m still not sure if I really am ready to write a blog—posting my innermost thoughts for all the world to see is frankly a little intimidating. And even though I know that it won’t really be “all the world” (in fact I’ll probably be lucky if even one or two people actually read this at all) I’m still intimidated.
I’ve been reflecting on this feeling for several days, and think that part of what’s holding me back is a matter of trust. When I’m engaging in a verbal conversation with others, I know who the people are who are hearing my message, and can judge the impact my words may or may not have on them. If I know them well and trust them, I might be more forthcoming with my thoughts, but if I’m speaking with someone I don’t know as well, I am naturally more guarded with what I share. A blog is meant to be reflective, but for me, my reflections are very personal—not something I choose to share with a wide audience, at least not with people I don’t know or trust. To put my words out into the world is for me a huge leap of faith. I don’t want to be guarded with what I write, but I’m not yet comfortable just spilling my guts for all the world to read.
Another thing that’s holding me back is a fixed mindset. I’ve had the good fortune this summer to be part of a book study about Carol Dweck’s book Mindset (#Mindset13), and I’m learning a lot about myself as a person and as a leader through that experience. Even though I think I have a growth mindset about my students and staff, and even myself as a leader, I am discovering that I have a fixed mindset when it comes to who I am as a person. In my reluctance to blog, I haven’t been able to give myself permission to be less than perfect—or to show my less-than-perfect self to the world. Instead of taking the opportunity to improve by trying something new, I’ve been afraid to be judged as less than smart. As Dweck says in Chapter 2: “The fixed mindset does not allow people the luxury of becoming. They have to already be.” I’m afraid that by blogging people will see that I don’t know everything about everything (which sounds silly even to me!), or that I won’t have a well-enough-developed opinion about something to be able to share it. My challenge: to move past this fixed mindset, and try something new and difficult in order to grow.
So. Here I am, ready to take a leap of faith—to trust that my words in the world will be well-received, and when they aren’t, to be prepared to learn and grow from the experience. I am determined to blog—to take my learning to the next step, and to join the 21st century as a leader and a learner. Wish me luck on my journey!
Growing Through Reflection 
Hi Heidi!
Congratulations!! Welcome to the wonderful world of blogging. It is so awesome that you faced down your fears and slayed your dragons and are now putting your thoughts out into the world in this format. I know I’m looking forward to reading what you have to say and I’m sure the #tlap tribe will support you along the way.
One word of advice…you never win the battle forever. Those dragons will reappear each time you’re thinking about writing another post. I know this from experience!! We have to keep slaying them over and over again!!
Thanks for the encouragement! I appreciate the advice about needing to be ready to slay more dragons each time I write–kind of like sailing in uncharted water–“Here be dragons…” I know it won’t be easy, but now I’m committed to continuing to grow through my writing, and I plan to keep on even when it’s hard. I appreciate your support!
I’m so glad you jumped in!! Dweck’s book is in my to be read pile! Can’t wait to read more from you
Thanks for reading! If you’d like to join our #Mindset13 book study, we’d love to have you join us. It’s every Monday at 2 pm CDT. Next Monday we’ll discuss Chapter 3, so it’s not too late to catch up!
Hi Heidi,
Congratulations on your first blog! From our conversations during #mindset13 chats, it is hard to imagine that you have a fixed mindset, but I can relate to your fear of showing a less than perfect self to the world. Thank you for taking the leap of faith, though, and encouraging the rest of us to take the same leap with you. Good luck, it is sure to be a wonderful and fascinating journey. Remember, your PLN will be with you every step of the way!
Thank you for your support and encouragement! I’m trying to figure out which parts of my life are still governed by a fixed mindset and which ones are influenced by a growth mindset–and why? It’s been an interesting (and humbling) journey so far…
I’m so glad to have such a great PLN!
Good Luck and thank you for sharing!
Thanks! I’m excited to continue learning through my writing…
Hi Heidi, I’m so thrilled I found your blog from Edinburgh, Scotland! (I follow Julie Adams, she retweeted and fortunately I saw it while cruising around Twitter.) I’m on the same journey at the same time and what you said is true for me too – and I think (hope!) everyone! I’ve also taken courage from reading Dave Burgess’ comments (thank you Dave!) so by blogging and connecting you’ve already helped people! I look forward to reading more about you and your thoughts on life and learning! We’re in this together. Jenni x
Jenni–thank you so much for your comments! Isn’t it wonderful to be able to connect with like-minded people from all over the world through the power of Twitter? I wish you all the best in your journey… Don’t fear the dragons–slay them! Glad to have met you!
Heidi,
Good for you! Enjoyed your post. I share your insecurities at times; let’s keep at it!
Thanks! It’s been wonderful to get so much positive feedback–very encouraging!
Thank you for sharing your thoughts so honestly. I have been struggling with the idea of blogging. I am new to twitter this summer and am trying to figure it all out. I agree that it is a “mindset” issue that I have to move past. Your words are encouraging. I look forward to following your blog and eventually jumping in to the blogging world with you.
Thanks for your comments! I hope you will take the plunge–it’s been very rewarding for me to get such positive feedback from so many people. Twitter is wonderful, but I think blogging will help take my learning to the next level. Best of luck!
Heidi, I can really identify with your nervousness about starting a blog. Like you, I tend to be guarded about what I share with those I don’t know well. Opening up to the universe of unknown readers is scary. What I found after releasing my first blog post, though, was a huge outpouring of encouragement and welcome. Thank YOU for sharing your thoughts and feelings! Looking forward to reading more of your writing!
Leah–
I felt the same incredible support! I’m so glad I gave it a try. Now I find I can’t stop thinking about things in terms of how I could write a post about them… I have several drafts going on different topics, and I’m starting to think of myself as a blogger! I loved reading your first post, and definitely will continue to follow your blog. Happy writing!